If you’ve always dreamed of being a prince or princess, then I’ve got some great news for you — Disneyland Paris is currently hiring.
The auditions are taking place in Ireland, but obviously the job itself will be based in Paris. If you’re successful, you could start working at the park as early as this summer!
They’re looking for 50 people, and two separate open auditions will take place on June 8. Although it’s not for the faint hearted, as they will last all day long.
If you’re interested, there are a few requirements. First of all, women must be between 160cm and 173cm and need to have “elegance graceful qualities and no visual tattoos”. Damn. I’m out.
In terms of the men, you must be between 160cm and 183cm with “compelling masculine features and no visual tattoos”.
If you don’t qualify, then they are also looking for people to work on their daily parade.
The advert says: “We are looking for enthusiastic and highly energetic people for our characters and parade department.
“If you dream of performing as a famous Disney Character and/or Marvel, to participate in our wonderful parade and cavalcades and portraying Disney Princesses and Princes.”
You can find out more information here.
Walt Disney is presumably spinning in his grave amidst the news that a NSFW version of Cards Against Humanity has been created using his legacy. Known as the House of Mouse’s overlord, Walt Disney helped shape the childhoods of billions of kids around the globe.
While Cards Against Humanity brings a very different type of joy into our lives, the two worlds have come together in one unholy union.
Available to buy from Cards Against Springfield, Cards Against Disney is the perfect way to spend an evening Goofy-ing off. While you might be a little disappointed to learn its a digital download rather than an actual box of cards, the set is currently on sale for just $5 (reduced from $19.95).
For your money, you get a grand total of 828 cards (260 black, 568 white). This is no small expansion pack, and as the description reminds fans, it’s designed to be a standalone game.
The site reads: “This game is a must for all Disney fans with an evil sense of humor. It’s guaranteed to bring hours of laughs! You don’t want to miss out on owning this game if you are a Disney fan!”
Answers include the likes of “Dory, the lesbian fish”, “vaginal burns from Lumiere”, and “Bambi’s dead mother”. Questions aren’t quite as risqué with options including “My childhood was ruined when I saw…” and “Me Tarzan, you…”
Elsewhere, fans of Friends can also indulge their darker side with Cards Against Humanity. Someone has added a Friends deck to the collection – and while it may not be an official Cards Against Humanity product, it can still be integrated seamlessly.
The fan-made fill-in-the-blank game is being sold on Etsy by Daisy Store Gifts and includes 99 grey cards and 180 white cards.
“While there are sufficient cards to be played as a stand alone game, they are sized identically and can integrate hilariously into standard Cards Against Humanity decks,” the description reads.
If you want to splash out on the proper deck, it will set you back £28.47 – if you’re looking for a cheaper alternative you can grab the printable version of the cards for just £4.74.
With so many Cards Against Humanity options, there’s something for everyone and every taste. Just maybe you shouldn’t play the Disney version with your granny.